A special guest post from my boyfriend Bobby:
One of my favorite times of year, Halloween. The leaves are burnt orange, the breezes brisk and the movies scary. Since Jill’s idea of Halloween movies are Hocus Pocus and It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, she asked me to step in with some actual horror. I wouldn’t say I’m any level of horror super-geek, but I was watching Freddy and Jason before I could count. So here’s a little list of films that don’t get the play they deserve. Enjoy.
While not technically a movie, this zombie mini-series is bananas. I don’t know if it’s something in the water over there, but the British make good TV. Like, really good TV. This is surely worth a watch – at only 5 episodes I say go for it in one shot – for a few reasons. First of all, it’s pretty meta: the housemates of Big Brother emerge to discover that the zombie apocalypse went down while they were locked away. But it’s also gory, there’s fast zombies and a ton of hilarious British cuss words. Plus the end is bad-ass. See it please.
Movies don’t normally creep me out. The Shining got me pretty good, but Phantasm is nipping at its heels as far creepy films go in my book. The Tall Man, that’s just about all you need to know. This guy steals the show. He looks like the reason you were scared of cemeteries as a kid. The spooky bump-in-the-night theme song, which I think easily rivals Halloween’s, just primes you for chills. (Also, Doug E. Fresh’s remix is pretty awesome.)
You just can’t beat a classic. Let me just clear something up: I love zombies. This movie is why. It’s black and white, first of all, making all of the risen dead that much eerier (way better than when Romero went color and they looked all blue). The opening scene, in the graveyard, that’s the other reason you were scared of cemeteries. If this movie didn’t ruin graveyards for you, you’re missing out. Plus, it has a major zombies-breaking-through-the-house scene like Thriller, just better. Again, the ending makes the movie.
Not so much a Halloween movie, this Stephen King flick really won me over. I went in thinking, oh great another Stephen King half-assed monster movie. But, for my money, the monster in the mist is nothing but context. Who cares what’s out there, when the truly frightening stuff is going down in the supermarket among the townspeople hunkered down inside? A cult arises, the people turn on each other and, after all, who are the real monsters? And THE ENDING! Zomg.
This is a sick sick movie. Cringe-inducing, psychologically damaging and there’s no point pussy-footing, I couldn’t look away. Don’t judge. For those of you who don’t know, this [Editor’s note: click at your own risk!] is the human centipede. The bad guy here is awesome. A psychotic surgeon with a nightmarish face. But don’t be deterred by the gross-out factor. The most awful things are in your head, you don’t actually need to see it as long you know. Then of course, you can’t un-know it. A sequel was also spawned, it’s main purpose to make you puke. It wasn’t that good.
I just wouldn’t be able to live with myself if didn’t mention a few more notables that almost made the list: Martyrs, Freaks, Carnival of Souls, The Devil’s Rejects, Evil Dead, Zombie, The Lost Boys, The Strangers, High Tension.
Please note that Bob’s taste in movies do not reflect my own. He’s got a pretty high level of tolerance for gruesome/horrific/messed-up sequences so if you can take it then I say, go for it! If not, then me and you can watch Charlie Brown together and be friends